Written with input from family members by son Richard and daughter-in-law Tamara, 16 December 2011. Read at 17 December Memorial Service by son-in-law Ray.
Eva was a wicked crokinole player. Sitting across the card table from her, the old wood crokinole board in between, she would look you in the eye, line up her checker, and ZIIIP! As likely as not the checker would end up in the center hole, while driving your checker off the table along the way. Then would come the coy look, as if to say, “nothing to it”. Then there were the hundreds of games of UNO, Skip-Bo and Aggravation – with the kids, with the grandkids, and with the great-grandkids. Eva knew how to enjoy a game, how to have fun, and when she laughed, which happened often, it was wonderful.
She was born on the prairies near Horse Creek (McCord), Saskatchewan, the fifth child of Russell and Annie Elford. Her sister Pansy remembered that as a child Eva was “a pleasant little blonde girl, spunky but quiet in her own way, a real treasure to us all.” Her brother Edwin recalled that, as a child,
she had remarkable patience. He told stories about how he would torment her as an older brother, but she refused to rise to the bait. However, he was quick to add that Eva and her sisters one time made a special tart for him laced with everything in the kitchen that was spicy hot, covered in whip cream – it
burned all the way through, he said, and reminded him that even Eva’s patience may have had limits.
The Elford family experienced both the hardships and joys of settler life through the depression years, while they persevered in building what became a very large and successful farm in southern Saskatchewan. Though she was physically somewhat distant from them for most of her adult life, Eva was very close to her nine brothers and sisters and their spouses. In later years they got together as frequently as possible to reminisce and laugh and cry and laugh some more, sharing memories of the sod house, the hard work, the bible studies, the singing, and the games of baseball with balls handmade by their dad. One story that got told frequently was of the runaway horse buggy that almost killed their mother while she was pregnant with Eva.
Eva was married in October 1940, at the age of 19, to Walter Elvin McCutcheon, who she met at a Vacation Bible School. They were married in a double wedding on the farm with her sister Pansy and fiancé Clarence Bien. Her brother Cliff officiated. Eva and Walter spent their early married life in various
Saskatchewan locations including Raymore, Watson, and Vonda. Sometimes things were difficult because Walter needed to be away often, either working as a travelling salesman, or, during the war years, working as a conscientious objector in northern Saskatchewan. The older children – Gerald, Ellen, and Earnest – recall times when he would have to leave, and how mother would wrap them in her arms and cry for a time after he left. Always practical, though, she would soon turn to the hard work of keeping the home and looking after the children.
Carman, Manitoba, was a longer stop on Eva’s life journey, although there was a brief stint in Morden as well. The years from 1950 – 1959 were focused on their dairy business and a busy restaurant where Eva did most of the cooking. By now three more children – Lauraine, Thelma, and Ronald – had come into the picture. Some of these years were very hard, with the family living in the basement of the restaurant and the older children working either with the dairy or in the restaurant helping mother. Eva found strength in a strong Church of Christ community in Carman – many of the people in that community became lifelong friends. Closeness to Walter’s family also brought joy and support into Eva’s life. Walter’s mother and Eva’s sisters-in-law Laura and Hazel were important to Eva during these years and later. Eventually Walter’s severe illness brought on by chemicals used in the dairy process was the
catalyst that prompted the family to close the dairy and restaurant to move to Portage in 1959.
Eva and Walter lived in Portage for twenty-four years until Walter’s death in 1983. Within six years of arriving in Portage the final two children – Richard and Walter – were born and the family of eight siblings was complete. These years in Portage were shaped by a flurry of activity revolving around church, family, and community activities. Eva was a key support for the church community, with weekly bible studies in her home. No one will forget her voice as she sang Rock of Ages, or Jesus, Rose of Sharon, or any of her other favorite hymns while holding her old worn bible in her lap at these gatherings. Her
generous hospitality was well known throughout the western Canadian Churches of Christ. Her home received visitors on a regular basis. Walter was not shy about bringing all sorts of people home at the drop of a hat, from church or work, and Eva graciously would set another plate or two at the table without blinking an eye (well, maybe she blinked an eye sometimes). In these years she travelled to India on a couple of occasions to be with her daughter Ellen and son-in-law Ray and their young family. For some twenty years beginning in 1959, she organized and cooked for Camp Jubilee, a successful and often
very large bible camp at Delta Beach north of Portage. Her loving-kindness radiated through those years,and hundreds of children experienced her love first hand. To this day there are adults in Portage, Winnipeg, and area who remember Eva from their camp experience. Also throughout those years Eva
would frequently be seen working with Walter in his real estate office – they seemed to truly enjoy working together. The last years of Eva’s life with Walter were spent on an 80-acre farm south of Portage on the Assiniboine River. Eva and Walter tended a huge garden on the farm where she spent hours and
hours working in the company of assorted cats, a dog, and a resident hedgehog.
The death of Walter in 1983 started a new phase in Eva’s life. She moved back to the city from the farm within a couple of years. Eva became the hub of a growing clan of grandchildren and greatgrandchildren, who gave her much joy. She became a very active volunteer in the community, canvassing for the Heart and Stroke Foundation and volunteering in the kitchen at the Herman Prior Centre. She became very involved in Cancer Care Portage, coordinating travel arrangements for cancer patients unable to drive themselves to appointments. She also served two terms as secretary for the local TOPS chapter, and remained very active with the Gideons. Eva took all these responsibilities seriously and found a great deal of fulfillment in them.
About ten years ago Eva’s family noticed that her memory had started to deteriorate, and within a few years she moved into the Lions Prairie Manor in Portage, where she came to be loved by staff and other residents for the same qualities of caring and generosity she had shown throughout her life.
Although family and friends never knew what to expect when visiting with her, they came to treasure the moments when her mind was clear and that playful twinkle came to her eye as she teased, laughed, and shared conversation with us.
Eva’s love was timeless and boundless, not measured in hours or days, months or years. Nor was her love constrained by physical distance. Eva had an intuitive sense of knowing when she needed to be fully present with a child or grandchild, a friend or even a stranger. When she was fully present, nothing
else mattered but you. Indeed, her life was a constant living out of her beliefs, captured by the great commandment to love her God, and to love her neighbour as herself.
Mother and Grandma: we remember your cinnamon buns at Christmas time, warm and fresh in the morning when we gathered as family. We cherish the conversations had while taking our turn washing the dishes with you. Thank you for carrying those hundreds of pails of water home in the early years to cook our meals and keep us clean. How many hours you spent sewing clothing for family and friends! And thank you for letting us help mark the patterns as children. We love you for taking the time in a hectic day to help us bake cookies as part of a school project to do a good deed. How many of us got through that last homework assignment because you were sitting with us at the kitchen table with your knitting for hours on end? Thank you for seeing the unique gifts in each one of us – and for being present with us in our pain and our happiness. Do you still cheer for the Blue Jays even when they are losing?
And for the Edmonton Oilers without Gretzky and Messier? And will you mind if we laugh uproariously if we see someone bend over to hang a Christmas ornament on the tree, bum outward? Is there an old grey cow where you are to chase Tootsie? We hope you have a warm, cozy flannelette nightie with long
sleeves (probably pink, with the obligatory Kleenex tucked up the sleeve), that buttons up close to your neck, a crisp, clean Sunday best dress, and of course an old blue parka with matching rubber boots to go up to the garden to work and to pray.
Grandma, Auntie, Mother, Eva: We are thankful you are at peace. We know how often you said that you wanted to rejoin Walter, and to go home. By now the tears you wept kneeling on the floor by Dad’s chair after his funeral will have been replaced by tears of joy at your reunion. We love you dearly and we know that you loved us from the depths of your heart. Now as we say goodbye to your physical presence, we go on in the joy of having known your love and that it will live on in each of us.
Eva, mom: you have now joined the cloud of witnesses who guide us and inspire us to live a life of love and service to others. We know we will hear your voice when we walk in the garden alone, wondering what to do, and you will tell us to carry on and work it out until it is done. You will continue
to nurture us as you did throughout your life. As we go home today, your love will go home with us in our hearts. We know you will be ready and able, as always, “to comfort, encourage, and beckon us onward”.
